Empowered by the Spirit to love my city
We’ve lived in Delhi for about eleven years now. I love Delhi. I love every part of it -from Rashtrapathi Bhavan and India Gate to the slums in Zakhira. When I usually tell people that I love Delhi, they’re quite shocked, because our city is usually not a loveable place. People who’ve visited Delhi or lived here at some point will agree that the people of Delhi can be rude, brash and condescending. The climatic conditions are extreme and harsh. The population is dense. Every place you go seems crowded. The pollution is intense. Long before Corona made an appearance we were already sending our children to school with masks on, because of the pollution.
Although our city may seem harsh and difficult, it is also vibrant and beautiful in many ways. The markets, the parks, the little green pockets and the art districts are all ‘beauty’ in a broken world. Diverse in culture, food and terrain, Delhi is a melting pot of people from different parts of the country. When people first move to Delhi, they try to seek out people from their own community or tribe. They live in pockets as groups from the same community. Many people initially moved here as refugees, so they constantly lived in fear.
We are taught to be loud and to defend ourselves, to yell and to make a scene. We are taught to push and to shove and to not let another person get the better of us. This culture slowly started rubbing off on me. Before I knew it, I was arguing and fighting with auto walas, and any person who tried to cut me off while I was driving. And if anyone took my designated parking spot on my lane, I was mad. Whenever I felt threatened, I would get angry and fight back.
My anger started influencing my family too. My anger, irritation and frustration were at their peak just before the pandemic hit. Then when our whole country went into a lockdown, it gave me time to introspect and look into my own heart. I thought about my heart idols and why I was reacting in anger. I realised that when my heart idol of ‘comfort’ was threatened, I would react in anger. I wanted to drive a certain way and park at a particular spot. I wanted to be comfortable. And when that was not so, my first reaction was anger. The lockdown gave me an extended time of staying indoors to introspect and repent of my heart idolatry.
The next thing that I learnt from my time of introspection was that I cannot live in Delhi based on what I’ve been taught by people. Well-meaning people are going to tell me to fight for my parking spot, otherwise, people are going to take me for a ride. Well-meaning people are going to tell me to yell at my house helper when she takes a day off without informing, otherwise, she’s going to cheat me. But the gospel is counter-cultural. The Spirit of God helps me to live counter-culturally when the city I live in advises me the exact opposite.
When Paul prays for the Ephesian church, he prays that they will be empowered by the Spirit to love like Christ. Ephesians 3:14-21 reads, For this reason, I kneel before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name. I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen.
I started praying this prayer. I knew I could not love the people of Delhi when I was angry or frustrated, but the Spirit of God in me could empower me to love like Christ. On my own, I would never be able to love unconditionally, but the Spirit enables me. He empowers me and equips me. He lives the life through me that I can never live. And when I begin to see people the way Christ sees them-broken, hurting and helpless, my anger is replaced with love and compassion. The more I introspected, the more I repented; the more I repented, the more I preached the gospel to myself. This became an intentional practice.
Today I realize that it is the Spirit of God that empowers me to live in Delhi. I still drive the same routes, people still cut me off on the road, they still park in my designated spot; but it doesn’t make me angry anymore. The Spirit empowers me to be patient, loving, and kind. When my city tells me to live a particular way to survive, the Spirit of God empowers me to thrive. It is a constant struggle and it is easy to slip back into my old patterns, but it is a good reminder that the power that raised Jesus from the dead lives in me and He empowers me to become more like Christ each day.
